WOW: Monday Recap!

Oh my gah- there was so much going on last night!

First and foremost- The Bachelor season premiere.  
Second- where my loyalty truly lies- the return of RHOBH.  
Also, I think there was a serious football game going on, but anyone who watched that knows that Sean got more action than the fightin' irish. #SECdomination

Sean is a total babe. I can say it once, I can say it again, and you know what? I can probably say it a few more times.  He's also from Texas (Dallas to be exact) which scores you big points in my book.  And he's in the insurance business (I was an insurance major in college...#random) so we have a lot in common.  Also, he loves Matitos and ate dinner there Saturday night. I ate lunch there Saturday and was apparently just a few hours too early to the party.

This season started off as per usual. The girls are truly crazy this season.  Apparently LA had a mass escape from the psych ward.  My friend, Reality Steve, predicts Catherine to win.  She's definitely not the prettiest, the craziest, the most fashionable, or the most unique in any way, shape or form.  But if Sean loves her, go Catherine (hope you're relationship lasts longer than Emily and Jef's)! If you're into spoilers and behind the scenes info- check out Reality Steve's website.  I can't help but read everything he writes and tweets, because I do love me some Bachelor gossip.  Also, it's kinda fun to watch the season knowing when the train-wrecks about to happen. 

Last night's highlights include the crazy girl in the wedding dress (she can blame one of the producers for her never-ending horrible reputation), the cray cray girl trying to reenact 50 Shades of Grey, a girl so drunk she fell down stairs, and the fact that Sean gave out like 20 first impression roses.  Ummm Sean? I don't know what kinda drugs ABC gives you- but first impressions happen ONCE, not twenty times...

Also- I should mention that Sean Lowe himself tweeted last night, "The smell of spray tan was strong that evening..." Sean, I should let you know that Africa called and could smell their spray tans too.  

After a rather crazy crazy crazy Bachelor premiere I switched gears to RHOBH.  I was confused when my DVR recorded it for 2 hours.  After an hour of not-that-exciting-drama, suddenly Vanderplump Rules just popped on my TV- after a very small introduction. Like they were trying to suck me into watching that DUMB show.  Well, sorry Bravo, I caught on.  I don't give a shiz about some dumb Beverly Hills restaurant called SUR where mediocre people call themselves models and Swedish princesses and work as waiters.  

RHOBH is even loosing my interest.  Look, Brandi is broke and heartbroken.  I can't think of a worse combination.  It was actually very sad to watch her confront one of her husband's mistresses.  Would I have done that via national television? I'm going to go out on a limb and say no.

YOlanda, girl, you just keep livin the good life.  You cook your hubby dinner and make him real happy.  You wear that Hermés belt to clean the horses stables and tell your daughter to be a model instead of play volleyball.  I'll be welding your Mother-of-the-Year Metal shortly. 

At this point Kyle is just trying to stir up un-necessary, un-exciting, stupid drama.  Don't invite Faye to dinner to stir a pot that is already boiling over.  We are bored of Brandi's stupid drama.  Also why is Lisa taking her side and being her BFF? And why does Lisa have THE WORST outfits??? Give up the pants with a button down shirt and a belt look!

Kim was MIA from this episode.  I think she might still be in Vegas celebrating her sons 21st birthday. 

Adrienne and Paul are starting a skincare line? Why would they waste their time? Everyone knows La Mer is the best of the best and there's no such thing as competition.  Maybe this is why they got a divorce?

Now, I think we should talk about something very important.  What happened to Taylor is awful.  I was terribly disappointed when I heard the news of Russell.  It's all much more complicated when you have kids and I feel very very very sad for her.  

However, I do believe she needs a MUCH better lawyer.  I am sorry but now her husband is dead and she has to give up a 10 carat wedding ring and TWO Hermés Birkins.  WHAT THE HECK!?! I mean that just isn't fair. Give the housewife a break.  You can take her man.  You can take the house.  But you cannot take a Birkin.  

Until next time reality TV rats!
XOXO
Little Miss Wade